Tuesday, January 08, 2008

My beginnings in Christian Faith - Part 1

[This is the first part of a multipart series]

I grew up in the Christian (New Testament) church, believeing that we should follow Christ's commands which would result in our becoming like Him and in doing so, be rewarded with a place in Heaven. Even Paul talked about "follow my example, follow me as I follow Christ". So, I found myself trying to do just that on my own strength and failing miserably! Besides the suffering experienced by the martyrs for their faith, i figured it also included those who were, like me, constantly attempting and failing to follow Christ! So, there I was, all the time wondering, "Is this Christianity--what it means to follow Christ? A constant 'try-and/or fail' experience? THAT brings glory to God?" Needless to say, I was somewhat confused and disappointed in myself. Then, on the other hand, I was struggling with all sorts of things: immoral thoughts, envy, anger, fits of rage, selfishness and pride. I was battling with and against myself and trying to live what seemed like an impossible Godly life! I was a mess!